Once you’ve coached so long as I’ve, you find yourself studying plenty of classes. However most of them didn’t come from certifications, programs, or textbooks.
They got here from expertise—teaching others, teaching myself. And truthfully? From getting issues mistaken greater than as soon as.
One factor I look again on now and assume, What was I considering?! is one thing I used to consider was useful…
One thing I noticed plenty of different coaches do, too: utilizing train as a type of punishment.
Ever educated a little bit tougher after a weekend of indulgence?
Added an additional spherical on the health club since you skipped a exercise yesterday?
Felt the necessity to “make up for” one thing?
That was precisely the method I took with shoppers after I first began out.
You ate greater than you have been “alleged to” over the weekend? Let’s burn it off.
You’re late in your session? Guess what—we’ll make it “damage” a little bit extra.
It strengthened a message that’s been echoed for many years: No ache, no achieve.
Someplace alongside the way in which, motion stopped being a celebration of what our our bodies might do and a option to improve their capability—and began changing into a software to repair what was “mistaken” with them and one thing we solely do once we did one thing ‘dangerous.”
Meals turned the reward.
Train turned the punishment.
And that, proper there, is the issue.
Utilizing Train as Punishment Adjustments Every part—Quietly and Deeply
Each time we deal with motion as “the stick” for doing one thing mistaken, we plant a seed. A seed that claims: Train is one thing to be prevented.
As a result of nobody appears ahead to being punished.
Even when a exercise isn’t meant to be punishment, that’s the affiliation we’ve constructed. We’re not transferring as a result of we need to—we’re transferring as a result of we really feel we “need to.” And that’s how one thing optimistic turns into one thing we dread. That’s how we go from wanting to maneuver to forcing ourselves to maneuver.
You possibly can’t construct one thing optimistic from one thing your mind has realized to concern.
After which we surprise why we’ve misplaced the motivation, the vitality, the thrill we used to really feel.
It Damages Our Relationship With Meals—and With Ourselves
Within the punishment mannequin:
Cake = additional cardio.
Lazy weekend = Monday burpees.
However right here’s the reality:
Meals isn’t one thing it’s good to earn.
And your exercise isn’t a “get out of jail free” card.
It’s additionally not an answer to cravings or overeating.
After we reinforce that meals = guilt and train = punishment, we strip away the chance to construct an empowered, wholesome relationship with both.
I bear in mind a consumer who overindulged virtually each weekend. And each Monday, I’d push them by way of an extra-tough session to “burn it off.”
What I didn’t do? Ask them why it stored occurring.
I did not see that my job as a coach wasn’t simply to “make up for” the conduct…
It was to assist them perceive it. To get interested by what was actually occurring. To work collectively to discover a extra supportive method ahead.
We didn’t change something. We simply stored repeating the cycle.
That’s not teaching. That’s harm management.
It Embeds Disgrace—And Disgrace Doesn’t Create Lasting Change
Disgrace may get somebody to indicate up. It’d push them to do another spherical, another dash, another cleanse.
But it surely doesn’t construct confidence.
It doesn’t create consistency.
And it undoubtedly doesn’t foster self-trust or long-term motivation.
What it does is make the coach the driving force.
Now the consumer exhibits up not as a result of they see worth within the course of—however as a result of they need to keep away from guilt, embarrassment, or disappointing somebody.
That’s not empowerment.
That’s concern.
And when concern is your major motivator, burnout, resentment, or avoidance simply follows.
Disgrace disconnects us from the why behind motion. It strips train of its pleasure, its function, and its actual advantages.
Why would we tie one thing as important and nourishing as motion to guilt, ache, or efficiency nervousness?
And extra importantly: Shouldn’t we be doing it for ourselves—to not please another person?
What I’d Inform My Youthful Coach-Self At this time
I’d inform her:
I do know you thought you have been serving to.
However you have been reinforcing the identical tales your shoppers already believed:
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That they needed to earn their proper to eat.
-
That their physique was an issue to be fastened.
-
That being shamed into change was efficient.
I’d present her there’s a greater method.
As a result of if a consumer “slips up” on their consuming plan, the answer isn’t to punish them with sweat.
It’s to ask:
What made that selection really feel like the precise one in the meanwhile?
How can we help you subsequent time to choose that feels extra aligned to your objectives and values?
If somebody misses every week of exercises, the reply isn’t to crush them once they return.
It’s to assist them reconnect to their why. To remind them what motion does for them—not what it takes from them.
Motion Ought to Be a Partnership, Not a Punishment
As coaches, our job isn’t simply to appropriate.
It’s to get curious. To pay attention. To information.
To create a secure house for self-discovery.
To supply help and accountability—however from a spot of respect and compassion, not management.
You don’t want to maneuver to make up for what you probably did—or didn’t—do.
You progress to construct one thing:
A stronger physique.
A calmer thoughts.
A deeper reference to your self.
That shift—from punishment to partnership—is the place actual, lasting well being begins.
What would you inform your youthful self about utilizing train as punishment? —Marlene
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